Adult female wanting spqnked by mother
Harriet's constant refrain was, "you are just so worthless and unlovable, why should I lift one finger to care for you".
Little Julia had grown into adolescence and young womanhood in a near constant state of loneliness and silent rage directed at her mother who had remained distant and uncaring all those years.
By the time Julia was a college senior, her amorous fantasies had crystallized into one recurring scenario in which a ravishing young woman would find her, fall in love with her despite all her unworthiness, sweep her off her feet, and carry her away to some romantic veil, and there, culminate the storybook romance with a wedding night of sweet sexual bliss.
Throughout her college days Julia hid her sordid fantasy life by working very hard at "keeping up appearances." She so desperately wanted everyone around her to believe she had her life well in hand, even though she knew that was the farthest thing from the truth.
Her mother Harriet hadn't liked her either, blaming her daughter for her father's desertion of the family soon after she was born.She knew deep inside that her hope of friendship and, perhaps, even love from one of her students was rooted in a deeply unhealthy fantasy, but she could not muster up the strength of character to relinquish it.Although she most certainly did not push her students to excel, Julia drove herself furiously in her efforts to entertain and please her young girl pupils.She especially loved the stories about some poor, worthless girl being rescued from her tawdry, boring life by a strong, self-assured hero who would love her and make all her decisions for her from then on.Julia daydreamed incessantly about being caught up in such "happily ever after" scenarios.