Dating profile verbiage
Don’t hound them with questions about what they’re feeling, text them incessantly when you become insecure, look to them for reassurances that they still love you, pressure them to have sex or throw yourself on them for sex.
Don’t act like a sick puppy and beg, plead, cry or tell them how utterly distraught you are.
Show up differently—in ways that your spouse has likely been asking you to do for years.
If they complained about your anger—show up calm and stay calm.
Find individual support for yourself so you can show up differently in this relationship and have support through the insecure and lonely times.
Show your insecurities to the professionals, not your spouse.
The problem with all these tactics is that they have the opposite effect from what the person is going for—they inevitably push their spouse away rather than bring them closer.
And although these attempts make sense, given that the person is feeling desperate and scared, they are the LAST thing you want to do if your spouse is saying they want space or—worse yet—they want to leave you.
Why am I sensing this opportunity is now permanently lost? Is there any car you’d rather be in should the smelly stuff hit the fan than a Range Rover? Undeniably good-looking, even to the most discerning eye, what I initially couldn’t figure out was whether this is a big car designed to look small, or just a smaller car than I’d been expecting.
Over the years I’ve had countless couples come into my office on the verge of divorce.
In several of these couples, one partner is all but out the door while the other partner is fighting for one last chance to save the marriage.
Don’t allow your fear and insecurity to sabotage your chances at saving this relationship.
You have to get them to fall in love with you again—by giving them the space to miss you—not by pestering them 24/7. Listen to calming music, go for a walk, call a friend etc., and DON”T chase your partner.